WIN OR DIE

[stoopid-silly.livejournal.com]

Name: Emy
How did you find out about the community? If it's through an LJ user, please tell us who it is: Quite a few people on my flist are in the community. I think matitablu, lunylucy, and nialyind linked it to me directly though.
Age: 23
Location: Splitting time between St. Louis and Chicago
Occupation: Student

All About You

1. Describe your ideal house/home. Please go into as much detail as possible, and be sure to include your ideal geographical location in the description!.

My dream home is a cottage on the coast somewhere. The house and the town itself is a little old and maybe kind of shabby, but in a charming, quirky kind of way. It’d probably be a tall old house with oddly shaped rooms and a spooky basement. I’d have plenty of property with most of it just being forest, but also maybe some overgrown old gardens. My dream would also include me being there with my family and lots of animals, though at this point the whole husband and kids thing is still a pretty vague and far off desire. I’d pick a location where there is plenty of undisturbed nature around, with mountains nearby, just because they’re great scenery to look at and fun to hike around it. I’d also want to be near enough to the ocean to have a great view and to be able to go to the beach whenever I felt like it. Being from the Midwest, mountains and oceans are still kind of magical things to me. I wouldn’t want it to just be a typical beach town though. I’m thinking more of a little port town in, like Oregon maybe, where the sun’s not always shining and it’s a little gritty. There is a definite atmosphere to the town and the people there.

2. Imagine you’re given the classic opportunity: a genie granting you three wishes. What would you wish for? Please be as elaborate as you can. Wishing for more wishes is not permitted!

1) Longer life. I’m not sure exactly how long. Maybe eternal life, but with, like, a suicide clause or something. The main thing is, I want to see what the future is going to be like!! Can you imagine the world thousands of years from now? So much is going to change and happen and it makes me sad that I’m never going to know what happens after I’m dead. And besides sheer curiosity about the future, there’s just so much to do and see in the world that there’s no way to fit it into one lifetime. I want time to experience and explore every little bit of earth. And once I’m done with earth, people will probably be flying around in their own personal rocket ships so I’ll go check out a little of space too. I realize outliving everyone you love would probably be hard, but then there is always the opportunity to continue to meet new people. It’s just too tempting for me. Too many mysteries about life need to be understood before I’d feel good about dying.

2) Money. If I’m going to explore every corner of the globe and maybe space, well I’m going to have to be a lot richer than I am now. Having tons of money would make it possible for me to do whatever my heart desired. I don’t think I’m greedy and don’t lust over things like expensive cars and big mansions. I’m just trying to be practical. What’s the point of living forever if I can’t afford to do all the things I wished to do? Of course I’d be generous with it too. I’d give my family whatever they wanted and more. And I’d donate a lot of it, especially to help protect the environment and endangered species. I think the first thing I’d do with my fortune is buy up all the undeveloped land I could to make sure it would stay that way. So while I’m globetrotting, I’d also be trying to save the environment. Sounds pretty good!

3) Courage. Unfortunately, I’m kind of a wimpy person. I’m nervous and shy and let people walk all over me. I’d much rather hide from a problem than face it. There are just too many scary things in life, so if the genie could give me a nice big helping of courage that would be nice. I’m sure I’d get much more out of life if I stood up for myself more and was assertive and less inhibited.

3. In your life so far, what accomplishment are you the most proud of? Why? You can list more than one if you have trouble deciding. ;)

I guess more than anything I’m proud of making and keeping good friends. Thinking back on my life, none of my standard accomplishments (like graduation or stuff like that) really mean that much to me, but being there with my friends does. And it really makes me proud that I’ve stuck by these people through all the ups and downs of our lives. Loyalty and understanding are so important to me, so I’m pretty proud to say I’ve had the same best friend since second grade and have stayed close with nearly all my high school friends despite us going our separate ways. Even as we’ve become very different people we’re close as ever. I just can’t stand the thought of drifting apart with someone I’ve shared so much with. Once I consider someone a friend, I really consider them friends for life. I’m pretty good at letting things go and don’t get in stupid fights because I’m pretty laid back and care too much about my friends to let something get between us. Really, I just value loyalty and the relationships we’ve built too much to let them fade away. So I’m pretty proud that I’ve kept these good relationships for so long.

4. Which of the following is most important to you: Love, Money, Knowledge, Family, Friendship, Adventure, or Pleasure? Which is the least important to you? Please explain why for each choice.

This is a terribly hard choice, but I think friendship is the most important of these. I picked it because I think a lot of the other words are included inside friendship (love, pleasure, adventure, maybe even knowledge and family). Maybe I’m being a cheater, but I think it’s true. You can have pleasure without friendship, but how can you have friendship without pleasure and love? Friendship is such a complex thing, and having a truly strong bond with someone is rewarding in a million ways. It’s hard to compare it to a simpler concept like pleasure, because it’s so encompassing. Sharing your experiences with your friends just makes everything that much better. Life would be so flat and dull without friendship; it’s really irreplaceable.

I’d say money is least important out of that list. And I know it might seem odd since I listed money as one of my wishes from the genie, it’s just that I don’t need a magic genie to give me the rest of the things on the list! Anyway, I feel like once you are above a certain level of poverty money just doesn’t add that much to life. You certainly can find happiness, love, knowledge etc. without money, it’s just a matter of being content with what you have.

5. What's one quote (or passage, song lyric, etc.) that effectively describes you and your values? Explain.

Okay, this question always stumps me and I left it for last because I… pretty much just hate quotes! They’re boring to me and my brain just doesn’t work that way I guess. I don’t usually find significance in picking out bits of text, and pulling lyrics out of a song just kind of ruin them for me. I’ve always been more swayed by, like, the ~~general vibe of something. I wonder if I’m alone in this or if I’m just lazy about remembering all the meaningful bits of words that I’ve heard in my life.

But since you’re making me, I guess I’ll pick:

Well it's true that I soared,
But then I went outdoors,
And I stood very still in the night,
And I looked at the sky,
And knew someday I'd die,
And then everything would be all right.

It's all right,
And everything comes down to this.
That everything there ever was
Or will be
Is all there is.

It’s from a song by Bonnie “Prince” Billy called You Want That Picture. It really isn’t that great without the music. The song is very simple and pretty and powerful. You should look him up if you like kind of folksy cool music. Anyway, the lyrics seem kind of depressing, but it’s my favorite thing to listen to when I’m feeling stressed out over stupid things. I guess it’s just a reminder of our smallness in the world. Remembering that your problems are very small in the vastness of the history of the world is very calming to me. Plus, there is great imagery in the song, and I can totally imagine myself getting lost in a huge starry sky. I guess I just find peace in stepping out of my ego-crazy mind and thinking about my total insignificance. It’s sort of a bitter-sweet thought, but this is one of the few songs I listen to specifically for the lyrics so I guess they’re meaningful to me. I don’t think it describes me fully, but I think it captures my general philosophy.

6. How do you manage your money? On that note, how important is money/financial security to you? Go into as much detail as you can.

I used to be really uptight about spending money back in the day. I’d put almost all of my birthday and Christmas money in my savings account, and was even more thrifty once I got my first job and actually had to work for my money. Over the years, I’ve kind of unraveled from super responsible child to kind of chaotic adult (at least in terms of managing my money, but probably in other ways too). I think it was easy to see how going out to dinner too much would cut into the $150 dollars I made that week serving ice cream. Now, what’s a $4 cup of coffee on top of the thousands of dollars of loans I already owe!? I’m lucky I saved up enough so that even as an unemployed grad student I can still indulge in little whims. But writing this out makes me realize how lax I’ve become in managing my money for the long term. My financial security has never been in the forefront of my mind. I definitely haven’t chosen a luxurious career path (zoology). I’ve always felt I’d be happiest doing something I liked and was interested in and that I felt was important, and don’t mind that that means I’ll have to make other sacrifices. But I also know that my parents would help me out if I really needed it, so money’s never been something I’ve REALLY worried about. I’m pretty lucky and maybe naïve, but I’m pretty confident that the future will turn out fine and I’ll be able to live within my means.

7. Name (and elaborate on) some of your hobbies. What are your favorite things to do outside of school/the office?

I think my only real hobby is art. Mostly I just draw dumb things in my sketchbook. I used to be way more disciplined and focused on making actual finished pieces, but I’ve gotten kind of sidetracked and lazy. Other than that, I like to take my dog on walks to different parks and sometimes cemeteries. I watch too much tv. I like listening to and finding new music. Sometimes I read books. My life is kind of painfully average. My favorite thing to do outside of school is hang out with my friends, if you can believe it!! If things get too boring we’ll go on “adventures” trying to find the absolute strangest and/or grosses places suburbia has to offer. Maybe the strangest thing that I do “for fun” sometimes is just read up on random scientific topics that I get curious about or read my old biology books and do some genetics problems or something. Punnet squares are fun and I’m pretty geeky.

8. Name three things you are afraid of. Explain.

1) Being alone. I’m pretty introverted and need a lot of time to myself. Being with tons of people for long periods of time just drains me. But having a strong connection to the people I love is really important to me. I hate thinking about losing all the people I love. It’s scary to think about family dying and it makes me sick to think about losing contact with my best friends. I really can’t say what I’d do without them. And then there is the fear of never finding that perfect man to share the rest of your life with. It’s scary and depressing to imagine a future where I never marry and end up living alone forever.

2) Wasting my life. Life is short and I feel like I spend too much time doing stupid things like watching tv rather than experiencing and learning new things. I’m 23 and I already feel like I’ve missed out on opportunities that I’ll never have again. I hope I can live a long and fulfilling life, but I worry that I’ll get too old and regret not doing more with my time.

3) People. I get really anxious around groups of people. I’m quiet and shy and meeting new people is really scary! There are really only a few people I’m truly comfortable around, and the rest just make me nervous. It’s even worse with people in positions of power. I want them to think I’m smart and capable, and the extra pressure just leaves me tongue tied and brain dead. I hate it!

9. Name (and elaborate on) your top three BEST and top three WORST qualities (personality-related, not physical). Please answer as fully as you can, as this is an important question.

Best:

1) I’m very independent. I like to do what I like to do, and it doesn’t really matter to me if that is what others are doing. It’s pretty hard for others to affect my choices and actions. I respect other people’s opinions, but in the end I’m always true to myself. I feel like I know myself pretty well, and it’s really painful for me to try to pretend to be something else. I feel like I’m setting out on my own path and have a little bit of a different view point than other people.

2) I think I’m pretty creative. Not just that I like doing art, but I also think I’m kind of creative in the way I think. I like coming up with new ideas and new solutions to problems. My brain is always day dreaming and I always have a little story running through my head. I’m curious about a lot of things, and thinking up reasons for why things are the way they are is one of my favorite things to do. That’s one of the reasons I like science so much! There are tons of questions in the world and it’s fun to think up possible answers. It’s a more creative field than it seems.

3) I’m very very honest, possibly to a fault. I firmly believe that honesty is the best policy. Nothing gets accomplished by skirting around the issues. I can’t stand to hide my real feelings. I definitely could learn some tact, but I’m not about to lie to spare feelings either. In the end I think it’s better to get things out in the open, rather than base things off a lie. Plus it’s just too much work to fake it all the time. I’d rather just be honest.

Worst:

1) I can be very selfish. Generally, I think about how a situation will affect me personally before imaging how others will feel. I just really like myself and want myself to happy and comfortable all the time, so it can be really hard to sacrifice for others. I think I’ve become more empathetic as I’ve gotten older, but I still find myself constantly putting myself first.

2) I’m super lazy. I’ll procrastinate forever on simple tasks and put in as little effort as possible. I even have a hard time getting myself going on things that I enjoy, like drawing. I want to be a doer who is constantly doing and experiencing and learning new things, but in reality I’m a lazy bum who sits on the couch more often than not.

3) I’m so passive! I’m cowardly and shy and cannot assert myself. I try not to be a doormat, but I have a hard time standing up for myself and getting what I want. It’s hard for me to be strong and fight for what I want because I hate conflict and would just rather give in. This is the trait I fight against most in myself because I feel like life would be better if I could just be more aggressive and confident.

A Song of Ice and Fire Related

1.Who are your favorite three characters in the series? Why?

1) Tyrion. It’s pretty hard not to love Tyrion. He’s written as an incredibly sympathetic character since pretty much everyone in the book hates him for being a “monstrous” dwarf when really he’s a pretty decent guy. He’s witty and funny and his chapters are usually the most fun to read because even if he’s doing something kind of boring his thoughts are usually funny and add an interesting perspective to the events. He’s self deprecating and wry and sarcastic. I love people who don’t take things too seriously and can find humor in almost anything, even their own misfortune. He’s generally honest with himself, but also totally able to delude himself if it makes him feel better, as he does with his whores. Constantly craving love and never finding it just makes him that much more real and loveable and sad. He can definitely be ruthless and mean, but he’s also a person who’s trying to do right by his family and the people of the realm. He’s smart and capable at playing the game of thrones, but he can also be kind and is able to empathize with others. He’s not an angel, by any means, but his motivations are understandable and complex which makes for a pretty interesting character in my opinion.

2) Sansa. It surprised me, but I really like Sansa and relate to her more than any other character. She pisses me off half the time, but I can’t help but feel like I’d be pretty much doing the same thing, especially at 13. She’s naïve and easy to manipulate, but it’s not because she’s stupid, she’s just genuinely trusting. She really believes that the world can be like her songs even after all she’ been through, and I find that outlook so refreshing, especially after reading hundreds of pages of people lying and manipulating each other. I love watching her grow and mature. It’s really rewarding to watch her realize that Oh yeah, Tyrion was actually kind to me, even though he was really ugly and a Lannister. She’s just starting to see the world from outside her selfish viewpoint, which I think is a great and realistic development. I also like that she’s learning to be much more cunning with Littlefinger, although I hope she gets out from under his thumb soon and learns to be independent without turning into a cold manipulator.

3) Daenerys. After Tyrion and Sansa I don’t really have any clear “favorites.” I like a whole bunch of characters a lot though, including Dany. I think she’s an awesome, strong, flawed, interesting character. I think I was initially attracted to her because she has such a separate story line, so she seemed more special than the rest of the characters. Plus we get to learn about all sorts of different cultures and far off lands through her, so I am always glad when her chapters come up. What really makes her interesting to me is how we’re watching her grow into her role as a leader. She had it pretty rough growing up with Viserys being such a dominating older brother and having no real home to speak of. But she learns to be more confident and assert herself, which I loved because being more assertive is something I always struggle with, so I like when characters overcome those kinds of issues. I also like that while she’s becoming a strong leader, she’s also making mistakes. But what’s best of all is that she recognizes her errors and wants to improve in the future. She’s been a good and creative leader with a kind heart, but she can get a little be crazy and has a short temper. In the end she recognizes those flaws, and wants to do better. I can’t help but love someone like that.

2.Who are your least favorite three characters in the series? Why?

1) Jon. I know Jon isn’t a bad person, but I think he is such a boring character and have a pretty hard time getting through his chapters. He’s just the typical hero for the story which I think makes him kind of dull. Not that being a hero or a good guy make you boring, but things just happen way too easily for Jon. It seems like the story is happening to him, rather than Jon having an impact on the story. Does he ever do anything wrong? Have an interesting thought? Make a decision for himself? His friends drag him back when he goes to Mole town, he’s ORDERED to join the wildlings, Summer attacks so he can escape, Stannis HAPPENS to attacks and the baby HAPPENS to be born while he’s chatting with Mance, Sam and the crow get him voted Lord Commander. He didn’t have to do anything clever or make tough decisions; things just happen for him. I think even from the very beginning I already disliked him. He had a very holier than thou vibe and was way too hung up on honor. I just wish he’s lighten up! Obviously he’s a good person. I could throw out a million positive, typically heroish adjectives that would fit Jon. Still don’t like him.

2) Littlefinger. At first I thought Petyr might be a cool character. He was clever and successful despite not being from a powerful family, and his deviousness didn’t strike me as too horrible. But the more we see of him, the more I just can’t stand him! He’s the most self-centered character in a series full of selfish people. Maybe it will be revealed that he has deeper motives, but right now it seems like he’s done incredibly cold, evil, monstrous things in order to gain himself some power and steal himself a little girl. And on top of that, he seems so smug about it. He’s so proud of all the chaos he’s caused and really thinks he’s smarter than everyone else in the realm. He hasn’t shown that he is capable for empathy for other people at all; they are just chess pieces to him. He’s the character that I hope something really terrible happens to, which makes me realize that he’s a pretty well written, interesting villainous character.

3) Cersei. Honestly, there’s a little part of me that really likes Cersei. She’s crazy and ruthless and pretty much heartless with the exception of her kids. I hate her, but she also cracks me up! She’s so petty! She takes joy in all the little bitchy things, which if I’m honest I totally do too! Her internal monologue is kind of hilarious because she really has fun being mean. But even though I find her funny sometimes, I can’t stand her and really cannot understand her. I’ve really tried to be sympathetic towards her, because it really must suck to be so power hungry while never being able to be a ruler since she is a woman. I can understand how that is frustrating, but try as I might I can never feel anything but contempt for her. She managed to get herself in a pretty good position as Queen, and still wasn’t content. Once she has power she ruins everything because she is suspicious and greedy and selfish and blind to her own weaknesses. She doesn’t seem to care about anyone else at all; even with Jaime, she only loved him because he was her twin and mirror. The fact that she cares about her kids proves that she does have a heart somewhere, but it is hard to read about someone who is so self absorbed, ambitious to the point of insanity and totally incompetent to boot.

3.#1 Favorite moment in all of ASOIAF so far? Why?

I think Tyrion’s escape is my favorite moment. He’s my favorite character, and even though I didn’t think he was going to die, I was still really worried about him. Also, I was really looking forward to Jaime and Tyrion reuniting because their relationship is really sweet to me. They both really care about each other, and even though they are barely together in the books, I don’t think a chapter goes by where they don’t think about each other. When Jaime frees Tryion, it’s really a pretty heartwarming scene between two brothers. And then of course the reveal about Tysha just tears my heart out. And then to further alienate Jaime by lying about Joffrey; it’s just so sad, especially because Jaime is really just trying to do the right thing. There are a lot of strong emotions wrapped up in that one little scene! And then add on top of that murdering Shae and Tywin; it’s quite an emotional rollercoaster! I can’t even say how glad I was when Tyrion killed Tywin. It was about time one of his kids stood up to him!

4. In your dream-world, how would you like to see the series end, and why?

Maybe this is really cheesy, but I just want all my favorite characters to end up happy! I don’t want there to be a sappy ‘happily ever after’ ending; I want there to be an interesting, believable, exciting conclusion. But I’ve really come to care about the people in these stories, and they’ve all suffered pretty horribly. I would love for some good things to start to happen to them. They deserve it!! I don’t think I’ll be satisfied if the Stark kids aren’t reunited or if Jaime and Tyrion don’t reconcile. I don’t care all that much about who ends up winning the war, although I think I’d like Dany as Queen. The characters and their relationships are most important to me.

Comments

Martell

[angerfish.livejournal.com]

Definitely Martell